Friday, January 31, 2014

Toot Your Own Horn

I recently started following a guy named Samuel Hershberger on Facebook and I really enjoy the things he posts. I think he uses Facebook as a form of blogging and I think it's cool - people are already there and everything.

He posted something a couple days ago titled "Humility is Bullshit!" 

Being the firecracker that I am, I was immediately attracted to the title and I wanted to know more.

Samuel gives the definition of the words modest (a synonym for humility) and moderate and explains that by the sheer definition of these words, you're doing yourself a disservice by participating in least in the way it's been encouraged by society.

We've been taught that we shouldn't toot our own horn and to think of ourselves as great is equal to being full of yourself or puffed up. 

But, Samuel (and I) would like you to see things from a different angle.

Have you ever tried to work with someone like a coach or expert who was REALLY great at what they do? Normally, the prices for a one-on-one experience have a minimum of 3 zeros BEFORE the period.

Those people may not be quoting Muhammad Ali, "I'm the greatest!" But, they're communicating that very thing with their prices. 

In business, we've been taught to allow testimonials to speak for us. Let OTHER people tell a potential client how great you are so you won't seem full of it.

Well, I think that's backwards.

Rule #1 - if you don't believe in yourself, who will?
Rule #2 - if you don't talk about your skills, who will?

The other day, I was talking to a friend of mine and I told her that I had struggled with my USP (Unique Selling Proposition) for The Millionaire's Assistant. I couldn't readily articulate to you what makes my Personal Concierge service better or different from any other service, other than the fact that it's ME doing it.

She said, "That's it! Your unique selling proposition is YOU!"

It can't be that simple. Can it?

Of course it can!

But, this isn't about me. This about you!

It takes some work to come out of your shell and learn to toot your own horn and it takes a nice amount of finesse to be able to toot your own horn without sounding like a pompous asshole...but, life is all about balance.

I watched all the drama unfold in the days and weeks following the Richard Sherman thing (something else Samuel wrote about) and I came to realize that the people who were attacking Richard are probably people who are uncomfortable with their own greatness.

Take a moment to think about it. I mentioned Ali before. You know what he said, "I was saying I was the greatest before I knew I was." But, then, he went on to prove it with his fighting record.

Sherman's stats back up his boasts. 

The other person who comes to mind is Floyd Mayweather. Now, I'm not particularly a fan of his, especially with those domestic abuse allegations and all, but..the man is undefeated. He can talk all the crap he wants when it comes to fighting because he is/was 42-0. Do you know how much WORK it takes to be 42 and 0?

So, think about that and let it sit with you and DEFINITELY read Samuel's post. 

Then, find your balance and get rid of the voices of fear, shame and/or doubt that have been keeping you from tooting your own horn. 

Embrace your greatness and don't be afraid to talk about it, especially when it counts!

Most importantly, don't look down on those who DO toot their own horns, especially when they have the track record of success that supports their claims.

Thursday, January 30, 2014

30 Things I Love About Myself

This year, I'm focusing on the Law of Attraction.

Believe in it, don't believe in it, whatever your choice, I'm not really trying to debate that point with you. The basic premise of it is this - Thoughts become things.

Plain and simple.

I'm currently reading "Life Lessons for Mastering the Law of Attraction" and I must say, it's a GREAT read! I plan to finish it before the end of the month.

In the book, there are all these stories of LOA at work in various people's lives and during one particular story, there is a reference to another book, Excuse Me, Your Life Is Waiting by Lynn Grabhorn.

In that book, you are asked to write down 30 things that you LOVE about yourself and over a 30 day period, you're to focus on one thing off the list.

I've been telling my friends and challenging them to write their 30 things down. I have almost 40, which is pretty amazing/cool.

When you start thinking about the positive things about yourself, it helps you draw attention away from the negative things and that's what we're aiming for here.

The goal is to fill your mind with great thoughts on a daily basis.

In the book, the storyteller has "I love my hair" as the first thing on her list and I'll admit, I totally jacked that one because I, too, think I have some great hair!

My challenge to you is to try and complete your list of 30 things before Saturday, February 1st so that we can start this little journey together.

If you don't have a whole list by Saturday, that's cool - get as many as you can down and as the time progresses, you will probably have great things to continue to add to your list.

If you write all 30 things down and on day 2, you can't remember what you wrote, go back to whatever you wrote and mentally repeated on day 1. It's ALL good!

Some of the other things from my list include:

  • I love my capacity to love
  • I love that I'm outgoing
  • I love that I'm a survivor
  • I love that I'm honest
  • I love my sense of humor
  • I love that I'm always willing to help
  • I love being a risk-taker
Maybe those can help get your juices flowing. There are other people's lists out there on the internet that you can probably gain ideas from as well.

If you so choose, please, share some of what's on your list in the comments. It may help others.

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

I've Been Doing This Wrong

If you regularly follow my blog, you may have noticed the silence since 2014 has started.

I've done some thinking and contemplating on what I should write about and what I should share with you and what would be "relevant" to you as a fellow entrepreneur.

I just had an epiphany. I've been going about this all wrong!

It's all relevant!

A few days ago, a friend of mine, who is also a well-known blogger, said that the problem is there are far more blogs/bloggers than actual readers. I agree with her on that point and it had me questioning my own blog and my "place in the blogosphere" as they say it.

Following that, I had a conversation with someone where I explained to them how I embrace the duality of who I am - first and foremost, I'm a Gemini and if you believe in that stuff (which I kinda do/don't) you'll understand that duality comes naturally to me. There's Nikki, The Millionaire's Assistant and Nikki, the person aside from The Millionaire's Assistant.

It's like an actor on TV...there's the character they show the audience and there's the person who walks around the house in their underwear in between acting gigs.

I haven't really minded this personality trait/character flaw (depending on which side of the coin you're on) until now. But, for 2014, I decided it's time to introduce both people to each other and the world. There's absolutely no reason I can't be ALL of me and live that out in whatever way suits me in that moment, because at the end of the day, that's what you're trying to do, too, right? You're trying to be you...all of you...all the time.

So, today, as I joined Tumblr - yet another fucking social networking site - I immediately thought about Jay-Z and reminded myself that I'm hustling backwards. In laymen's terms, I'm not being fully authentic to who I am.

I didn't really start this blog for you, I started it for me...after all, it's called a MY Entrepreneurship Diaries. 

What I'm saying is, I've been thinking too hard - can you relate to that?

I've been spending so much time thinking and/or worrying about what you may want to read or know that I haven't written ANYTHING. 

Note to self: What's the point in having a blog if you're not going to actually write the damn thing?

Everything has its place in the lives we live and we're all just trying to do the best we can and figure stuff out. I think we can do it together.

My initial hope/intention would be that some of the stories/experiences I share with you here would resonate with you in some way and help you to know that you're not alone, even when you think you are.

My head is so crowded with thoughts and ideas and stuff and I think it's all part of the process of being an entrepreneur, and more importantly, of being a PERSON!

So, I'm going to change the format, a little bit...or a lot of bit, depending on the mood...and I'm going to open up about more things and we're going to work through all of this together. There won't necessarily be a particular that, I mean, you can't just say "Nikki's blog is about x,y,z." 

And, that's ok!

This blog is going to be the musings and thoughts about life and entrepreneurship and success and failure and friends and family and all those things that go into this huge pot because, if you think that being an entrepreneur is the same as being a "regular"'ve got it ALL MISUNDERSTOOD!

There is a certain level of thinking and creative and a hodgepodge of other things that we do that the average Joe Clock-Puncher doesn't. Our thoughts are different because we're different. 

I know I'm not the only one.