I've Been Doing This Wrong

If you regularly follow my blog, you may have noticed the silence since 2014 has started.

I've done some thinking and contemplating on what I should write about and what I should share with you and what would be "relevant" to you as a fellow entrepreneur.

I just had an epiphany. I've been going about this all wrong!

It's all relevant!

A few days ago, a friend of mine, who is also a well-known blogger, said that the problem is there are far more blogs/bloggers than actual readers. I agree with her on that point and it had me questioning my own blog and my "place in the blogosphere" as they say it.

Following that, I had a conversation with someone where I explained to them how I embrace the duality of who I am - first and foremost, I'm a Gemini and if you believe in that stuff (which I kinda do/don't) you'll understand that duality comes naturally to me. There's Nikki, The Millionaire's Assistant and Nikki, the person aside from The Millionaire's Assistant.

It's like an actor on TV...there's the character they show the audience and there's the person who walks around the house in their underwear in between acting gigs.

I haven't really minded this personality trait/character flaw (depending on which side of the coin you're on) until now. But, for 2014, I decided it's time to introduce both people to each other and the world. There's absolutely no reason I can't be ALL of me and live that out in whatever way suits me in that moment, because at the end of the day, that's what you're trying to do, too, right? You're trying to be you...all of you...all the time.

So, today, as I joined Tumblr - yet another fucking social networking site - I immediately thought about Jay-Z and reminded myself that I'm hustling backwards. In laymen's terms, I'm not being fully authentic to who I am.

I didn't really start this blog for you, I started it for me...after all, it's called a MY Entrepreneurship Diaries. 

What I'm saying is, I've been thinking too hard - can you relate to that?

I've been spending so much time thinking and/or worrying about what you may want to read or know that I haven't written ANYTHING. 

Note to self: What's the point in having a blog if you're not going to actually write the damn thing?

Everything has its place in the lives we live and we're all just trying to do the best we can and figure stuff out. I think we can do it together.

My initial hope/intention would be that some of the stories/experiences I share with you here would resonate with you in some way and help you to know that you're not alone, even when you think you are.

My head is so crowded with thoughts and ideas and stuff and I think it's all part of the process of being an entrepreneur, and more importantly, of being a PERSON!

So, I'm going to change the format, a little bit...or a lot of bit, depending on the mood...and I'm going to open up about more things and we're going to work through all of this together. There won't necessarily be a particular structure...by that, I mean, you can't just say "Nikki's blog is about x,y,z." 

And, that's ok!

This blog is going to be the musings and thoughts about life and entrepreneurship and success and failure and friends and family and all those things that go into this huge pot because, if you think that being an entrepreneur is the same as being a "regular" person...you've got it ALL MISUNDERSTOOD!

There is a certain level of thinking and creative and a hodgepodge of other things that we do that the average Joe Clock-Puncher doesn't. Our thoughts are different because we're different. 

I know I'm not the only one.